This is a tier-list for the weapons introduced in the emergency meeting dlc. The guide assumes a 1 weapon run with no eggs and independent of the character selected.
S tier
For me, a S tier weapon would be the one that does great in the early game and scales well into the late game without the need for any arcanes. Unfortunately for the 1 weapon run there aren’t really any weapons that fit into this category.
A tier
Lifesign Scan
This is one of the best items added with this dlc. With potentially infinite scaling and built in healing it will let you easily survive a standard run. And with a few arcanes like Sarabande of healing and Blood astranomia you can easily go for a much longer run as well
B tier
Report!
This weapon would have ranked much lower, with the need to rely on other sources of damage like Blood astronomia arcane early to survive and a short range directional damage effect it’s not really a good weapon. However it’s saving grace is the evolution and the item required to upgrade it. With the passive ability essentially giving you a garlic effect that will get you through the first few minutes and with the ability to completely delete 1 type of enemy from your screen (can be somewhat effective depending on how many different enemies you have on screen) to the speaker now projecting waves without stopping, it becomes a much better and useable weapon as long as you can actually survive long enough to evolve it.
C tier
Science Rocks
The main “issue” with the weapon, is that like with the Report! you have to rely on other sources of damage to get you through the downtime. Early on, you don’t throw out items nearly fast enough to clear out the enemies swarming you. And later on with the evolution, the squares on their own don’t scale the damage nearly enough. The main draw of the weapon is the rocket fire that appears when you step on the squares in the right order, however with the chaos of late game vampire survivors it might be incredibly difficult to do and most of the time you will just end up triggering a somewhat disappointing explosion.
Sharp Tongue
Sharp tongue is just an ok weapon, it CAN be made better with arcanes, however at the end of the day it just doesn’t scale that well with area of effect which is incredibly important for weapons in it’s category. It’s evolution also doesn’t change much and just doesn’t do anything particularly remarkable. If you do decide to go with this weapon, be sure to grab the Gemini arcane to double your number of attacks.
Clear Debris
This weapon is essentially just a song of mana before the evolution, just worse. The projectiles falling down the tube don’t go through all the enemies and you can only ever have I believe 2 tubes at a time no matter how high your amount is. The evolution is the reason this weapon isn’t lower since it does work pretty well in mid-late game despite there being better options.
Hats
This is just an average weapon similar to the bones with nothing much else to say for it.
D tier
Lucky Swipe
Lucky Swipe is the only weapon in this tier list for 2 very simple reasons: it’s base version is complete rubbish and the evolution isn’t THAT much better. The biggest flaw with the base version of the weapon is that no matter how high you scale your area of effect, the card will almost always be above your character. Meaning that any enemies coming from below you will be able to damage you. The evolution isn’t that much better either. The one thing it has going for it is the high damage, however between the long wind up and short duration it’s just really not good.
F tier
Just Vent
The weapon that’s based on possibly the most iconic part of the game ended up being dead last. While the concept for the weapon is cool, dump enemies into vents and eventually eject them with the evolution, the game misses 1 crucial point. The enemies are all around you in vampire survivors. So even if you somehow manage to survive early game till the evolution, with the weapons low duration, area of effect AND low cast frequency, you will have to grapple with the fact that every time the evolution sucks in enemies to the side of the screen, you WILL be damaged by them as they pass through your body. And the eject gates don’t even appear on both sides of the screen so you have some breathing room. They just appear on 1 side at a time and the only thing you can do is attempt to dodge enemies as you run to the side, ejecting enemies faster, and wondering why you picked this weapon in the first place
